FOOD:
NOTES: Okay, okay. It looks like I’m just eating junk food. Continue reading “Daily Log: 2 September 2023”
FOOD: Calories 1610
NOTES: While I’m no longer counting calories, the first is my “cheat day.” Continue reading “Daily Log: 1 September 2023”
I didn’t realize I would be doing this in July, but I’m so glad I started doing this plan and I’m so glad I started blogging about it. It feels like a good start in taking control of my life. It has come at the cost of some of my favorite things to spend my time on, but that will change. I needed time to figure everything out and to obsess over every little part of my life.
So, August is over and I intend to stop counting calories for the most part. I will still be checking my calories on certain items and trying to keep my daily numbers low. But I think I have a decent handle on calorie density, how to structure my days, and what to avoid. Should I start putting on weight at all, I will immediately go back to counting calories & fat. I think it can be a useful tool in trying to get control of life.
Exercise is going very slowly. I spent years getting to a point where I find movement difficult, so I can’t expect to undo that in a month. I’m working on it, and my hope is that as I lose weight, getting exercise will only become easier. I got a bike to just get my body moving because this area is not conducive to walking, but I may need to do some morning or afternoon laps between houses. It will be boring, but that doesn’t matter. It’s one of my biggest obstacles and I need to work on that. When the bike is easier (it is difficult because of leg issues), I will be able to do that more. I’m not giving up.
I’ve been thinking about what life will look like once I move from here. I cannot get a clear view of it, but I know I will take some of my issues with me. But I find that the more energy I have, and I have had a ton this month, the more I want to purge and reduce the things around me. I find myself cleaning when I would have left things messy for months. It’s almost like I’ve woken up. My feelings about this are complicated. I feel guilty for who I was when my parents were disabled. I should have done better, but as usual I thought my time with them was unlimited.
If I’m really honest, I think the epiphany I’ve had is that I want to live. And I’m not sure I cared before. After witnessing the hardships my parents went through as disabled people, I don’t want to live in the same way. I don’t want that future. I cannot control everything that happens in life, but I can do better to make sure I’m healthy. I can stop letting problems build up and consume me.
August was a great month. I enjoyed my food, I enjoyed my routine, I enjoyed letting go of things I used to eat all the time. And I managed to lose somewhere in the neighborhood of 15–20 pounds. Because of the limits of my scale, I had to wait until I was under the maximum to start recording. I actually will never know how heavy I was, but I do know it was over 400. I worry everyday that my scale is not actually working and that I am not under, but that my scale is just making things up. It will take me time to stop believing that. It’s not a rational hangup, but it is something on which I dwell constantly.
I’m looking forward to the future.
EXERCISE: resistance band exercises on arms only
FOOD: Calories 1698, Carbs 315g, Fiber 39g, Protein 60g, Fat 16g
NOTES: My prediction is that I will not have lost as much this week as I did in previous weeks. Continue reading “Daily Log: 31 August 2023”
EXERCISE: 10 minutes on exercise bike, brief resistance band exercises
FOOD: Calories 1132, Carbs 227g, Fiber 35g, Protein 46g, Fat 1g
NOTES: I need to work on my Mexican Bowls. Continue reading “Daily Log: 30 August 2023”
FOOD: Calories 1821, Carbs 355g, Fiber 73g, Protein 78g, Fat 19g
NOTES: I meal prepped a few things on Sunday and tried two of them today. Continue reading “Daily Log: 29 August 2023”
WEIGHT: 390
FOOD: Calories 1328, Carbs 312g, Fiber 50g, Protein 43g, Fat 0g
NOTES: The soup was pretty good, but it needed to be spicier. I find that I want everything to be spicier lately.
I lost again. I hope I keep it up.
FOOD: Calories 1917, Carbs 345g, Fiber 31g, Protein 34g, Fat 34g
NOTES: Cooking the potatoes in the rice cooker makes them so good. I got that tip from Cooking with Plants and I cannot imagine cooking them any other way. Continue reading “Daily Log: 27 August 2023”
FOOD: Calories 1633, Carbs 291g, Fiber 29g, Protein 68g, Fat 41g
NOTES: This was my first time trying Aldi burger patties. They are pretty low in fat, which is nice, but they are a bit mushier than other vegan burger patties.
FOOD: Calories 1788, Carbs 321g, Fiber 56g, Protein 59g, Fat 45g
NOTES: I felt pretty good about everything today. While I’m impatient to lose weight, I just need to stick to a plan that I can continue forever. If that means slower weight loss, then that will just have to be okay. I think I would rather find ways of eating I love and that are sustainable than to lose weight as fast as I can.
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