Welcome to my search for health and fitness.
My name is Brian and I make a lot of excuses. I’m always waiting for the best time to start taking care of myself, depending on others and waiting for all aspects of my life to be perfect before I can commit to exercise or eating well. But those perfect times never arrive. The people who are going to do the journey with me are never going to join in. Life does not settle.
My 44th birthday was last week and it was a rough day. I had ordered clothes for myself, clothes I needed for some upcoming projects where looking slightly better in necessary. I decided to not play games and ordered my items two sizes larger than I needed, but when I tried them on nothing fit. In some cases I blame poor quality control, but that doesn’t account for all of it and may in itself be an excuse. I’m fat. I’m too fat for the huge sizes I had ordered. That was my breaking point.
After a small period of self-pity, I decided I had to do something about all of this. I’m not happy and I still believe I deserve happiness. But in waiting around for it to arrive, I seem to have forgotten that I have to do that for myself. So, I’m doing that for myself. I’m determined. It feels dire.
My current weight is unknown. I think it is close to 400 lbs, but it could easily be more. My scale doesn’t go that high, but I will probably get a new one soon. Until I know, I will just say I don’t.
My goal right now is to keep a daily food log, which I intend to put on this site as often as I can. I am also working on strengthening with resistance bands and keeping my body moving with an exercise bike. It’s a comfortable place to start, but I’m sure I will learn new things along the way and I’m sure I will change things as I figure it out.
I will be uploading photos throughout this process. I’m not expecting anything amazing, but I’d like a record of progress. I think it’s sometimes hard to see without photos.
This site is for myself. If you are reading this, I am honored you are giving me some of your time. If you wish to follow me, I would appreciate that greatly. But everything I do here is for my own motivation and to hold myself accountable.
I’m looking forward to seeing where I can take myself.
