Tag: thoughts

The Wandering Hermit: Walks With Mom In The Morning

   19 May 2024  Leave a Comment on The Wandering Hermit: Walks With Mom In The Morning

I had a nice walk this morning; I decided to go East on Burris, which I hadn’t done.  I think I’ve only driven that way once or twice and I live on the corner.  I liked it because of the hills; the only concern I might have walking that way is those two little dogs that live across the street on Fairgrounds.  I’m not concerned about what they might do to me—they are far too small for that—but I don’t really want to distress them unnecessarily.  I’ve been saying I need to go meet them, but I walk so early that I don’t think about it.  I think it might be better if they knew who I was walking by.  In order to walk that direction, I have to walk in their line of sight for a while.  As long as I keep that part of the morning to before 6, I should be okay.  They get let out when the sun comes up.  I have a strong preference for not walking in front of people’s houses if I don’t have to.  I can walk half a mile that direction and only cross one driveway, and that house is set pretty far back.  

It’s been six years without Mom, but honestly I don’t feel like that exactly.  She’s my constant companion, especially on my morning walks.  It’s interesting when we dwell on those we miss.  Mom is my morning companion.  Dad is with me in the late evening.  I know that has a lot to do with my associations with when they were active, but I’m not sure it’s only that either.  Why do my grandparents each have their own full season on the calendar, like some kind of mythology I’ve formed?  We are in the midst of the transition from Mimi to Pap in fact.  Why?  When I think about that, Mom being dawn and Dad being dusk feels pretty natural.

The passing on a calendar of a day doesn’t really cause me any extra stress.  I don’t need to be reminded; I never forgot.  But I have had a stressful week otherwise.  I know that weight loss can cause hormonal issues, so I’m not sure if that is what has been going on, but I have been all over the place mentally.  And I lack the patience I usually have.  Everyone else has managed to make that about themselves, and I cannot help that.  Sometimes I just need space and quiet.  On paper it would seem like I have those things.  In practice, I do not.  I’m not entirely sure how to set proper boundaries anymore.

[Walk #59]

The Wandering Hermit: No Excuses

   18 May 2024  Leave a Comment on The Wandering Hermit: No Excuses

I had to keep reminding myself that there are no excuses; walking daily is mandatory.  I was not very into it.  There was a nice fog again, so I was able to enjoy that, but really I just tried to get through my walk this morning.  By the end, I did feel pretty good.  That didn’t keep my mood elevated all day though.

[Walk #58]

Daily Log: 18 May 2024

   18 May 2024  Leave a Comment on Daily Log: 18 May 2024

Weight: ?

Exercise: 1.85 mile/2.98 km walk (6:23am–7:06am, ☀️60ºF/15.5ºC)

Mood: Meh

Food: 980 calories

  • French vanilla iced coffee
  • candy apple oatmeal
  • russet potatoes, green beans, jalapeños
  • russet potatoes, cauliflower, Prozis Teriyaki Sauce
  • mandarin oranges

The Wandering Hermit: Fields Draped In Fog

   17 May 2024  Leave a Comment on The Wandering Hermit: Fields Draped In Fog

Well, yesterday proved disastrous.  I’m hoping for a better day today, but it would be hard for it to be worse.  I was having a lot of feelings and by afternoon I was just over everything.  I ended up sleeping early, which was best.  I don’t know what my issue was.  I had woken up slightly off and never did quite shake it.  

This morning’s walk was lovely.  The fields were draped in fog, which never doesn’t feel magical.  I saw a deer cross the road, crows overhead, and a rabbit in the distance.  That’s of course in addition to tall the birds chattering away in the morning.  It’s nice; I’m going to miss that.  I’m sure wherever I end up living will not be as full of wildlife as this place is.  That is a shame.  

I might try to get some things moved to Edmond today.  I have some things that would be nice to get rid of for a while.  Just boxes of books, kitchen stuff that’s been packed for a while… things like that.  I think we will eventually appreciate any effort we put in early, especially with boxes of books.  

One good thing from yesterday was that rice I made.  I did jasmine rice and kale, portioned out into 200 calorie servings.  That sort of replaced my oatmeal for a couple of days.  It was a great mix.  I might even try getting those down to 150 calorie servings and using that as my starch for a bit.  I’ve been enjoying potatoes, but I do have a lot of rice at the moment.

[Walk #56]

The Wandering Hermit: I Need This Day To Start Over

   16 May 2024  Leave a Comment on The Wandering Hermit: I Need This Day To Start Over

Pouring rain this morning, so I waited until later to walk.  It was still a little too muddy, but it might rain on and off throughout the rest of today, so it is probably the best I was going to get.  After 20 minutes, which is my minimum, I was annoyed by the mud and stopped for the day.  If I do any additional exercise today, I’ll either stay on the porch or inside.  I’m feeling slightly less chipper than I have been feeling this week.  

I’m still low on food and have yet to do much about it, so this morning I made a pot of rice & kale.  I portioned that out into 200 calorie servings and had one with broccoli for breakfast.  It was pretty good, but I’d still like a broccoli break!  I guess I’ll just plan on going to get food tomorrow.  I need to just sit down and make the list.  I don’t usually struggle this much with it, but I also rely on broccoli so much that not I feel lost (even though I can just get green beans… and I know that).  

I got quite a bit of sleep last night.  Hopefully I can get plenty tonight as well.  I don’t like alternating sleepless nights.

My weight was up a lot this morning.  It’s not Monday, so the weight isn’t official, but it did surprise me how much weight can fluctuate.  Hopefully things are back in line by tomorrow morning.

[Walk #55]

The Wandering Hermit: I’ll Miss Some Of This

   15 May 2024  Leave a Comment on The Wandering Hermit: I’ll Miss Some Of This

Rainy walk this morning.  I did wait for the rain to lighten a bit, so I got started a little later than I have lately.  It was nice one, and the playlist I made was perfect for a more laid back walk.

I was feeling a little sick overnight, so sleep was scant.  I imagine I’ll sleep this afternoon, but it is a rainy day, so it’s not the best day to get things done with moving or mowing.  We are trying to stay on top of it.

Yesterday, Justin & I took some things to the storage unit.  We met Brent there.  I hadn’t seen the space since it was rented last year.  I understand what Brent has been doing with it, but it’s going to be a challenge to merge my things with his.  We might even need an additional unit.  I’m looking forward to moving; it’s going to be so much better for my fitness.  I LOVE my outdoor walks surrounded by trees and birds, but the gravel road can be hard to walk on and absolutely everything becomes a mess with a little rain since the ground is all clay.  It is beautiful when it is dry, but it isn’t reliable.  I’d like to have consistency.  If I’m feeling into it, I can always go walking on a wooded trail or around the lake.  I could even go do walks in rural residential areas.  The point is, I would love to have a reliable trail.  I’ll miss walking up and down the street though.  I’ve been enjoying that.

[Walk #53]

I got in a little more walking at noon, but it was hard to do while Justin was outside mowing.  He needs things, Chip needs things…. it’s just far easier to get interrupted.  

[Walk #54]

The Wandering Hermit: I Think I’m Indecisive, But I’m Not Sure

   14 May 2024  Leave a Comment on The Wandering Hermit: I Think I’m Indecisive, But I’m Not Sure

I got a lot of sleep again.  According to my watch I slept for 10 hours & 18 minutes.  That’s too much, but I do seem to be alternating between that and 4 hour nights.  I don’t really know why I’ve been doing that.  

I’m running low on groceries, so it’s time for an evaluation of what I’m going to be having for the next few weeks.  Oatmeal has been so helpful; that is definitely staying on my list.  It’s been 40 weeks of this food plan and I’ve just started to need a break from broccoli.  While I love having broccoli as part of my daily diet, I think I might try not having it for a week or two to give myself a chance to fall in love with it again.  I have eaten broccoli just about daily for close to two years now, so I guess taking a break won’t hurt me.  I haven’t been making soup as much as I used to, but I’m also eating a smaller volume of food daily than I did when I first started.  Soup was meant to fill up my belly and it seems less necessary than it had before.  I have been very into wraps and sandwiches.  I think I could try doing salads and sandwiches for a while.  My issue with salads is that fresh produce is expensive and I never do seem able to eat everything before it goes bad, even when I’m eating salads a lot.  I do have better luck with slaw mixes, but they sort of lack that refreshing quality that lettuce can have.  I guess I’m just feeling indecisive today. 

[Walk #52]

The Wandering Hermit: Porch Cardio

   13 May 2024  Leave a Comment on The Wandering Hermit: Porch Cardio

Rainy morning.  I probably could have taken my morning walk; the rain was very light.  I did some jogging on the porch instead, which definitely is a completely different type of workout.  I am able to get my heart rate up faster, but it feels less intense than even uphill walking.

I have been trying to get my heart rate to return to normal as quickly as possible.  Consistent cardio exercises seem to be the way to do that.  In addition to my morning walk, doing just a 15 minute afternoon walk might be the best way to do that.  I’ll give that a try for a few days and see if that changes anything.  

The Wandering Hermit: My Right Foot

   12 May 2024  Leave a Comment on The Wandering Hermit: My Right Foot

For some reason, my right foot was not willing to participate fully this morning.  I had a small pain that was causing me to sort of walk to the left, but it was helped by walking along a bit of road that created an incline that I had to walk against on the right side.  I had a pretty active Saturday for me, so I probably did a little too much.  

Today, we were supposed to go to Edmond in the afternoon, but I ended up falling asleep while watching a movie.  

[Walk #50]